Because a person’s self worth is developed during childhood, there may be several factors that contribute to low self esteem:
- Every child needs attention and love. If you grew up in an environment where there was childhood abuse and/or neglect, chances are you struggled with a good self-image. You may have learned that you didn’t deserve more than you got.
- “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me” may have been a common phrase you heard as a child. It’s a lie. Criticism (by family, peers, teachers, etc.) plays a big part in low self-worth. Being bullied and peer pressure interfere with healthy child development.
- Being compared to others leads to a feeling of not being good enough and contributes to our self-image.
This may lead to the following characteristics when a person becomes an adult:
- A high sensitivity to criticism, possibly leading to perfectionism.
- Being overly defensive possibly with an inability to accept responsibility.
- Developing the habit of over-analyzing and over-thinking everything.
- Negative thought patterns and judgements of self and others.
- A tendency to try and please people.
- A failure to recognize one’s own potential and good qualities.
Self-awareness and self-worth are life-long pursuits and can be improved. Understanding how and when low self-esteem developed allows us to:
- Build on our “good” qualities
- Transform negative thoughts
- Accept ourselves and develop resiliency (not being happy all the time, but rather learning to go with the flow and adapt to life’s challenges & having the confidence to do that.)
I encourage you to go on a journey of increasing your self-esteem. As you are learning and growing, please remember a few important things:
→ Your past does not define you.
→ Your emotions are not you.
→ You are an adult, you do not need approval from anyone.
Check out this video on understanding self-esteem:
Disclaimer: The opinions expressed on Actualized.org are not necessarily the opinions of Michelle Suzanne Scott. The video below on self-esteem is well explained and appropriate, however viewer discretion is always advised.
Resources:
www.growing-self-esteem.com, www.self-esteem-experts.com, www.actualization.org
HOW TO RAISE YOUR SELF-ESTEEM, the proven, action-oriented approach to
greater self-respect and self-confidence. Author: Nathanial Branden.